Best Short People Jokes

The best of the best short people jokes are here.

• Why did the short guy fall asleep in his harness and his helmet? Because he was tired from climbing into bed.

• How do short people go shopping for pants? They buy shorts.

• How does a short person reach the top shelf? They don’t.

• What is a short person’s favorite side order? A small fry.

• What is a short person’s favorite dessert? Strawberry Short Cake.

• What do you call a short person with a bad spray tan? An Oompa Loompa.

• Where do short people buy their shoes? The kid’s section.

• How do short people shoot a bow and arrow? With a rubber band and a toothpick.

• Where is the worst place for a short person to stand at a concert? Behind anyone at all.

• Why did the short person bring a parachute to the bar? So they could get down from the barstool.

• Why was the short guy scared of the wiener dog? Because it was too tall.

• What 3 things does a short person need to take a bath? Floaties, a snorkel, and a lifeguard.

• What do you call it when a short person waves at you? A microwave.

• How does a short person look you in the eye? They get on a ladder.

• God only lets things grow until they are perfect. Some of us didn’t take as long as others! –Short People

• Why did the short guy drop out of college? Because he couldn’t reach higher education.

Short People Problems Jokes

Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash

Tell them you're problems being short with these short people jokes.

• You know you’re short when your kids can keep things out of your reach.

• You know you’re short if you can play handball on the curb.

• Why was the short person stuck in the elevator? Because they couldn’t reach the ‘door open’ button.

• How does a short person take a bath? They get into the sink!

• What’s a short person’s favorite thing on the menu? Short ribs.

• You know you’re short when you can do pull-ups on a door handle.

• Why shouldn’t you hire short people as chefs? Because the steaks are too high.

• Two tall guys walk into a bar. Why didn’t the short guy walk into the bar too? He walked under it.

• You know you’re short when your own shoelaces hit you in the head.

• Why did the short guy lose the race? He was a little slow.

• What do you call a door for short people? A doggy door.

• You’re so short; you can’t reach your own head.