Really Funny Short People Jokes

Hold your laugh! below are the funniest short people jokes you might have ever heard.

• How do you win an argument with a short person? You stoop to their level.

• Why couldn’t the short guy finish the fun-sized candy bar? It was too big!

• Why did the short guy wear stilts? So he could be as tall as everyone else.

• Have you heard about those self-driving cars? Turns out it was just a bunch of short people driving around.

• Why was the short lady scared of the iguana? She thought it was Godzilla.

• You know you’re short when people ask you which Minion character you played in the movie.

• Why did the short guy buy the house with the water fountain? Because he’s always wanted to own a swimming pool.

• What do short people call burritos? Sleeping bags.

• My friend who’s really short had a party the other night and he only invited other really short people.

• It was just a little get-together. Short people are oppressed. They’re always getting overlooked.

• I asked a dwarf to lend me 5 dollars yesterday.
  He said, “Sorry, I’m a little short.”
  

• How do short people go dress shopping? They buy t-shirts

• My girlfriend is very short and she gets fed up with me making fun of her height. So tonight I’m going to make it up to her. I’ve got a good bottle of wine and a DVD box set of her favorite TV show. When she gets in from work I’m going to order her favorite takeaway which we’ll sit and eat while we drink the wine and watch the DVDs. Then afterward I’m going to go upstairs and run her a nice hot sink.

• I was walking down the street yesterday when I saw someone pickpocket a dwarf. I don’t know how anyone could stoop so low.

• Why do short people have a hard time raising a family? Because they struggle to put food on the table.

• I raised the alarm at work today. The midgets were furious.

• Why do midgets always laugh when they play soccer? Because the grass tickles their balls.

• I met a couple of really short people today. They were really down-to-earth guys.

• What do you call a poor midget? Short changed.

• Did you hear about the psychic midget who escaped from jail? He’s a small-medium who’s at large.