50 Best Office Quotes That Will Stick With You Forever

Best quotes from The Office from All Casts

1. Best Creed quotes The Office

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Take a look at some of the best Office quotes from the most underrated characters of all time in The Office which will make you adore Creed Bratton, head of quality assurance, and the strangest man in the office.

• "Nobody steals from Creed Bratton and gets away with it. The last person to do this disappeared. His name? Creed Bratton." ~ Creed Bratton

• "I’m not offended by homosexuality. In the 60s I made love to many, many women – often outdoors in the mud and the rain – and it’s possible that a man slipped in. There’d be no way of knowing." ~ Creed Bratton

• "I’ve been involved in a number of cults both as a leader and a follower. You have more fun as a follower but you make more money as a leader." ~ Creed Bratton

• "No matter how you get here or where you end up, human beings have this miraculous gift to make that place home." ~ Creed Bratton

• "The only difference between me and a homeless man is this job. I will do whatever it takes to survive…like I did when I was a homeless man." ~ Creed Bratton

• "I'm a pretty normal guy. I do one weird thing. I like to go in the women's room for number two. I've been caught several times and I have paid dearly." ~ Creed Bratton

• "In case you were wondering, my spirit animal is a duck billed platypus." ~ Creed Bratton

• "I write songs for myself, songs come out of me, I get enjoyment out of it. Basically, that's it - I get enjoyment out of my songs, I know they're good songs, and know that the people around me who I respect are all getting up on these tunes, and the feedback is really good, so that's it. There are people who will receive them, and don't receive them. Not in a spiritual sense, but in a commercial sense - do these songs treat people, and so far they're working." ~ Creed Bratton

• "Oh, I steal things all the time. It's just something I do. I stopped caring a long time ago." ~ Creed Bratton

• "I don't want to take myself too seriously. That's my lesson to myself." ~ Creed Bratton

2. Best Jim Office quotes

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These best Office quotes from Jim Halpert will remind you just how much you’ve laughed your butt off at all of his pranks on Dwight Schrute.

• “Everything I have I owe to this job…this stupid, wonderful, boring, amazing job.” ― Jim Halpert

• “God, this is so sad, this is the smallest amount of power I’ve ever seen go to someone’s head.” ― Jim Halpert

• “He has not stopped working…for a second. At 12:45, he sneezed, while keeping his eyes open, which I always thought was impossible. At 1:32 he peed. And I know that because he did that in an open soda bottle, under the desk, while filling out expense reports. And on the flip side, I’ve been so busy watching him that I haven’t even started work. It’s exhausting, being this vigilant. I’ll probably have to go home early today.” ― Jim Halpert

• “So this is my life. Until I win the lottery. Or Pam finally writes that series of young adult books.” ― Jim Halpert

• “My roommate wants to meet everybody. Because I’m pretty sure he thinks I’m making Dwight up. He is very real.” ― Jim Halpert

• “It is not a good time for me to lose my job since I have some pretty big long-term plans in my personal life with Pam that I’d like her parents to be psyched about. So, I am about to do something very bold in this job that I’ve never done before: try.” ― Jim Halpert

• “All I know is that every time I've been faced with a tough decision, there's only one thing that outweighs every other concern. One thing that will make you give up on everything you thought you knew, every instinct, every rational calculation. Love. No matter what happens, you gotta forget about all the other stuff. You gotta forget about logic and fear and doubt. You just gotta do everything you can to get to the one woman who's gonna make all this worth it. At the end of the day, you gotta jump.” ― Jim Halpert

• “Four years ago, I was just a guy who had a crush a crush on a girl who had a boyfriend. And I had to do the hardest thing that I've ever had to do, which was just to wait. And a lot of people told me I was crazy to wait this long for a date with a girl that I work with but I think, even then I knew, I was waiting for my wife.” ― Jim Halpert

• “I am a black belt in gift wrapping.” ― Jim Halpert

• “Stanley just drank OJ out of my mug and didn’t seem to realize that it wasn’t his hot coffee. So the question has to be asked, is there no limit to what he won’t notice?” ― Jim Halpert

3. Best Kevin from The Office quotes

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Read these best Office quotes from Kevin Malone which are totally relatable to all of us.

• “I got six numbers. One more would have been a complete telephone number.” — Kevin Malone

• “I wanted to eat a pig in a blanket, in a blanket.” — Kevin Malone

• “I have very little patience for stupidity.” — Kevin Malone

• “I want to be wined and dined and sixty-nined.” — Kevin Malone

• “You think this is a great party? This cake has vegetables in it.” — Kevin Malone

• “Whenever i try to make a taco, I get too excited and crush it.” — Kevin Malone

• “I just want to sit on the beach and eat hot dogs. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.” — Kevin Malone

• “I watched tv for 14 hours.” — Kevin Malone

• “Mini cupcakes? As in the mini version of regular cupcakes?” — Kevin Malone

• “I do deserve a vacation. Sometimes Batman’s got to take off his cape.” — Kevin Malone

4. Best Angela quotes The Office

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These best Office quotes from Angela Martin will remind you just how there are plenty of things about her that don't really make any sense.

• “Sometimes the clothes at gap kids are just too flashy…” — Angela Martin

• “It’s not my fault I was exposed to Harry Potter.” — Angela Martin

• “The thought of popping one of your beets into my mouth makes me want to vomit.” — Angela Martin

• “I’m very sensitive about my petite figure.” — Angela Martin

• “I don’t have a headache. I’m just preparing.” — Angela Martin

• “If you ever put sunblock on a window you might be Michael Scott.” — Angela Martin

• “It’s not a surprise to me. Pam is the office mattress.” — Angela Martin

• “No, orange is whorish.” — Angela Martin

• “If you pray enough you can change yourself into a cat person.” — Angela Martin

• “I don’t back down.” — Angela Martin

5. Best Meredith quotes The Office

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Take a look at these best Office quotes from Meredith Palmer that will always be hilarious.

• “Cronkite was hot. If I could go back in time, I'd take that moustache ride.” — Meredith Palmer

• “You're the people's princess! Diana was nothing!” — Meredith Palmer

• “Tell ya one thing, I'm not gonna be a good mom tonight.” — Meredith Palmer

• “You should stay. I have Vienna sausages...and napkins.” — Meredith Palmer

• “I've never been cheated on, cheated, or been used to cheat with.” — Meredith Palmer

• “If I got that card, we'd be in the bathroom doing it right now.” — Meredith Palmer

• “Yeah, I have this thing about men cutting or threatening to cut my throat. Don't try to cut my throat!” — Meredith Palmer

• “Talk about vacation daaaays!” — Meredith Palmer

• “All morning I look forward to my afternoon cigar and I'm not stopping for anybody.” — Meredith Palmer

• “I've had two men fight over me before. Usually it's over which one gets to hold the camcorder.” — Meredith Palmer