77 Funny Valentine Quotes for Couples or Singles

77 Funny Valentine Quotes for Couples or Singles
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Tripboba.com - On February 14th, most couples try to be sweeter to each other because it is Valentine's day. Greeting their spouse with love messages is one of the things you should do on this day of love.

But sometimes, you can try to be sweeter and funnier at the same time to make your spouse happy. Also, not only couples can be funny on this day; single men and women can be funny too.

So, to make you funnier, Tripboba has some funny Valentine quotes you can send or make post it. Find your favorite ones inside this article. Be happy because it is a happy day.

Funny Valentines Day Quotes

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Here are some funny Valentine quotes you can send to your love partner.

  • "I love going out with you on any day except Valentine’s Day. The rapid demise of my pocket money burns my soul so badly. Happy Valentine Day!" - Unknown

  • "I am not saying that I care about money more than I do about you. But it’s my father’s advice to spend my money for good purposes only! Happy Valentine’s Day!" - Unknown

  • "You cannot define love in one word and you cannot celebrate love in one day. That’s why I don’t have any plans with you on this Valentine’s Day!" - Unknown

  • "Today, let us celebrate the early demise of all men in promoting love just like Saint Valentine did before his own sad demise!" - Unknown

  • "I like the way you chew my mind like a bar of chocolate. It’s just a matter of days before I become brain dead because of your love!" - Unknown

  • "I have found my way back to your heart like a stray dog finds his way back home. Thank you for letting me in every time. Happy Valentine’s day!" - Unknown

  • "Loving you is my job and every job holder needs the motivation to work. Can I have some motivation tonight? Happy Valentine’s day!" - Unknown

  • "You don’t always have to arrange candlelight dinners for me on Valentine’s day; it’s absolutely ok to buy me some jewelry sometimes!" - Unknown

  • "I just found out that I have fallen in love more deeply than I had originally planned. You can take this as Valentine’s day confession from me!" - Unknown

  • "Happy Valentine’s day my love. Can you help me find the cheapest dinner plan for the two of us tonight? I’ll be forever grateful to you for that!" - Unknown

  • "What if I told you that you cleaning up all the dishes seduces me more than you whining about a candlelight dinner on Valentine’s day?" - Unknown

  • "Before our relation, you told me you ain’t got time for Valentine’s day. Well, I’ve just realized that you lied about that. Happy Valentine’s day anyway!" - Unknown

  • "If my wealth grew as much as my love for you, today, I’d be on the Forbes list of richest people in the world. Happy Valentine’s day!" - Unknown

  • "I don’t usually hang out on Valentine’s day, but when I do, I make sure It’s with someone so gorgeous as you!" - Unknown

  • "I wish I could strip your clothes off tonight like the way you strip a bar of wrapped chocolate. I really wish I was with you tonight. Happy Valentine’s day sweetheart!" - Unknown

Funny Valentine Quotes for Friends

Funny Valentine Quotes for Friends
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You and your friends can celebrate Valentine’s day together. Send these funny Valentine quotes to your not-in-love partner.

  • "On this Valentine’s day, if you don’t have anyone, don’t be sad. Just know that you’re not the only one." - Unknown

  • "Girlfriends are temporary, friends are permanent. Accept this truth, my friend. Let’s spend this Valentine’s Day high on drugs and drunk as a lord!" - Unknown

  • "If you feel sad that you stay alone during Valentine"s day, just remember that nobody loves you on any of those other 355 days of the year." - Unknown

  • "Do you know the very famous quote saint Valentines said before his death? – he said, “don’t buy a cow when you can have milk for free!" - Unknown

  • "Love is just like a fart. If you push it, it will be crap. Happy Valentine’s day, my friend!" - Unknown

  • "If you feel lonely today, just remind yourself that yesterday you felt the same as today, and tomorrow will not be different either. Happy Valentine’s day!" - Unknown

  • "Whatever you do, don’t commit yourself. You’ll be dead long before your death. Happy Valentine’s day!" - Unknown

  • "Love is like a blanket. It will keep you warm and safe for some times, but very soon you’ll realize that it was an electric blanket and someone else is in control of the switch!" - Unknown

  • "I don’t mind being a security guard while you’re dating as long as you’re paying for me being drunk & grabbing some hookers from the club." - Unknown

  • "It’s always a wonder how the least intelligent guy in the friend circle gets the most beautiful girl in the class. Happy Valentine’s Day!" - Unknown

  • "Dear friend, wishing you a happy Valentine’s day. I hope you will enjoy yourself with your girlfriend since she won’t leave you to accompany your friends for a night out party." - Unknown

  • "May God fills your heart with love and your wallet with money so you can buy some chocolates for your honey! Happy Valentine’s day!" - Unknown

  • "Whoever said Valentine’s day is only for lovers? I love you my best friend! Happy Valentine’s day." - Unknown

Funny Valentine Quotes for Singles

Funny Valentine Quotes for Singles
Photo by Engin Akyurt from Pixabay

Who said a single person like you can't celebrate this lovely day? Of course, you can! But, it is up to you for celebrating this day with love or hate in your heart.

These are a few funny Valentine quotes for singles you can write on your status."

  • "The best way to spend this Valentine’s day for me is to spend it with the love of my life – food. Wishing Happy Valentine's day to you!" - Unknown

  • "You don’t need a Valentine to spend time with on Valentine’s day, just like you don’t need HIV on AIDS day." - Unknown

  • "Celebrating Valentine’s Day looks great in movies. But in real life, it’s just horrible and costly. Try buying a bouquet of flowers and you’ll know!" - Unknown

  • "You may not have someone to love but at least your pocket is safe & secure. Enjoy your life man! I’ve started to envy you already!" - Unknown

  • "Every Valentine’s Day creates a hole in my pocket that I need the whole year to repair. I’m glad that you’re still single!" - Unknown

  • "The power of the human brain is unlimited. Even a loser can create an imaginary Valentine for himself anytime. Then my friend, why you’re so sad?" - Unknown

  • "Even God couldn’t find someone for you in all these years. Maybe she is not born yet, or maybe she is from mars! Happy Valentine’s Day!" - Unknown

  • "I get it, you are not single; you’re just waiting for something real, which unfortunately will never happen. Happy Valentine’s day!" - Unknown

  • "Having a great time with my GF so far, just wanted to know how you’ve been doing today? How it feels like dating yourself? I’m dying to know!" - Unknown

  • "I have never seen anyone more romantic and caring as a person than you are. Maybe this is the reason why you are still single!" - Unknown

  • "If you remain single for the next 2 years, you should really consider dating yourself. Because you are one of a kind and there’s no one like you!" - Unknown

  • "To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. Happy Valentine’s Day to Me!" - Unknown

  • "I love being single. It’s almost like being rich." - Sue Grafton

  • "If being in love is what it means to be free, then this Valentine’s Day my heart is in solitary confinement!" - Unknown

  • "This February 14th, take a moment to laugh thoroughly at your singlehood, everybody else does!" - Unknown

  • "I had every intention of celebrating Valentine’s Day, but when Cupid got around to me it seems he had run out of arrows." - Unknown

  • "If singleness were a crime, you, my friend, would certainly be one of the most dangerous criminals on planet Earth." - Unknown

  • "One of the biggest pros of being single is that you’re 100% sure you haven’t get yourself involved with the wrong person." - Unknown

  • "If lovers get half price off on Valentine’s Day, then singles should just get everything for free." - Unknown

  • "I've been single for a while and I have to say, it's going very well. Like...it's working out. I think I'm the One!" - Emily Heller

  • "It sucks spending Valentine’s Day alone, but at least I’ll have more money to spend to make myself happy!" - Unknown

  • "Singlehood is good on your pocket. Wishing a fantastic Valentine’s Day to you." - Unknown

  • "Does anyone know the perfect gift to get a robot to wish it a Happy Valentine’s Day?" - Unknown

  • "This Valentine’s Day, I want to give a mighty shout-out to all my peeps for still having the courage to smile despite being as single as f**k!" - Unknown

  • "When you are single you can't be dating the wrong person." - Unknown

  • "This fine V-Day, I’m going to spend every single cent I have on my one and only love – me." - Unknown

  • "I’m single today because my heart was created to pump blood and not fall in love." - Unknown

  • "I am out to break the Guinness world record for most Valentine Days spent alone." - Unknown

  • "I have chosen to be single because it makes my bank account as fat as Shrek." - Unknown

  • "Me and an entire box of chocolate all to myself is a match made in heaven!" - Unknown

  • "By God, I shall spend the entire Valentine’s Day with the love of my life…Myself!" - Unknown

  • "I gave my no-good boyfriend the boot earlier this month, making this the happiest Valentine’s Day I’ve had in years!" - Unknown

Sarcastic Valentines Day Quotes Funny

Sarcastic Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Photo by Armin Rimoldi from Pexels

Here some funny Valentine quotes for such a skeptic person like you.

  • "You don’t need flowers to smell sweet and don’t need ornaments to look beautiful. And then I thought you don’t need Valentine’s day either to be loved." - Unknown

  • "The only thing worse than a boy who hates you: a boy that loves you." - Markus Zusak, 'The Book Thief'

  • "Love thy neighbor — and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier." - Mae West

  • "Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby — awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess." - Lemony Snicket

  • "My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me." - Jerry Seinfeld

  • "Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing." - Natasha Leggero

  • "A girl can wait for the right man to come along, but in the meantime that doesn’t mean she can’t have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones." - Cher

  • "So you see, my son, there is a very fine line between love and nausea." - King Jaffe Joffer, 'Coming to America'

  • "It’s been so long since I’ve had sex, I’ve forgotten who ties up whom!" – Joan Rivers.

  • "You don’t appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay good money for later in life." – Elmo Phillips.

  • "Guys are like roses, watch out for the pricks." – Unknown

  • "Hearts and roses and kisses galore, What the hell is all of that s**t for?
    People get mushy and start acting queer,
    It is definitely the most annoying day of the year.
    This day needs to get the hell over with and pass
    Before I shove a dozen roses up Cupid’s ass!
    I’ll spend the day so drunk that I just can’t speak,
    And wear only black for the rest of the week.
    Guys act all sweet, but it soon will fade,
    For all they are doing is trying to get laid.
    The arrow Cupid shot at me must not have hit,
    Because I think love is a big crock of s**t!
    So here is my story, what else can I say?
    Love bites my ass… F**k Valentine’s Day!" – Unknown
  • "Roses are red, violets are blue…
    I’m in love but not with you…
    When we broke up you thought I cried
    But all it was… Was another guy,
    You told your friends that I was a trick,
    I told mine that you had a weak dick…
    I said I loved you
    And you thought it was true,
    But guess what baby?!
    You got played too!!" – Unknown
  • "Roses are red, violets are blue,
    Sugar is sweet, and so are you.
    But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead
    The sugar bowl’s empty and so is your head.’ – Unknown
  • "My love, you take my breath away. What have you stepped in to smell this way?" – Unknown
    "I want to feel your sweet embrace, But don’t take that paper bag off of your face." – Unknown

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